Happy Halloween

I can't believe that today is Matthew's official 5th Halloween.

The first year being a new and thrilled mom that had finally been given the gift of a child to celebrate the holiday spirit in me and with me, I bought him two costumes. And this year is the first year since then that I only bought one. I get a little excited with him.

This morning, he was so excited when he woke up. You would think it was Christmas instead of Halloween. I wished him a Happy Halloween and he whispered and squeezed it back to me, like Christmas Morning wishing you love. He was an extra special cuddlebug this morning, making it hard for Mommy to get motivated and him ready for school. He said "Just 5 more minutes and 5 more cuddles."

He thought maybe at his Halloween party at school today that there might be skeleton cookies with sprinkles on top!!!! Extra pronunciation on the SPRINKLES ON TOP.

I will be heading early today to his school, where they will have him dressed in his Black Spiderman outfit and they will have made pumpkins with vegetable faces. It is going to be alot of fun.

Here are a few more for memories sake:

MANIC MONDAY - BUT A GOOD MANIA...FOR ONCE

IT'S JUST ANOTHER MANIC MONDAY...LA, LA, LA....WISH IT WERE SUNDAY...

CAUSE THAT'S MY FUN DAY...LA LA LA

RED SOX AND THE PATRIOTS (THAT i AGAIN DIDN'T WATCH) LA, LA, LA, LA, LA...

WORLD SERIES WIN AND SMASHING THE REDSKINS 52-SOMETHIN...LA, LA, LA, LA, LA

sorry....actually yesterday I wasn't feeling good so I was thrilled to find myself up at midnight last night watching the wonderful game with the red sox winning. I clapped to loud though and woke up Matthew, but not before actually watching the whole game.

I love them all. Jacoby is my favorite though. What an experience for someone with that Little League little boyish grin and what a talent he is!! Thank you Jacoby!!! Thank you Mike Lowell for your Home Run last night:-) Thank you for giving us that fourth run. Talk about a finger biting, glued to my seat last inning. I could go on and on but this is going to be short. I have to pick up Matthew from school because he actually made it today.

Here is a picture of my little guy modeling his Halloween attire this morning. Front and Back for Mommy.

What Do You Get When You Take One Housebound little boy who has been sick and AND add in a few toys around the house and some chocolate chips?

Answer:

ALA Chocolate Chip cookies crumbled with peanut butter and Candy Corn AND A HALLOWEEN PARTY

He was insistent on making cheese and milk with oil to make cookies but when he started pulling out my pans to bake the concoction....

I hurriedly picked other ingredients that were available RIGHT THEN AND NOW & didn't have to be baked.

They are now in a covered container awaiting Daddy's taste test when he gets home from work.

Today for one child, he has played with every toy he owns, a little baking and creating and all with Mommy running around trying to play with him and keep up after every mess. He's worth it...

Although, we could have done without the orange juice spilled on Daddy's rug and couch pillows, applesauce spilled on the floor and Mommy's second degree burns on my left toes as scolding hot pizza fell out of the toaster oven and on my foot instead of the plate.

That's ok...It's my fault for trying to make lunch while changing the channel on the remote and insisting he wash his hands and cleaning up the latest toy in the kitchen that wasn't there two seconds earlier.

I am looking forward to tomorrow night. I am going with some moms from the meet up group I belong to on a Coach Bus to Mohegan Sun...yeah!!! I don't gamble, but from 6PM until 2 am (if I'm not sleeping), I will be forgetting all about the spills on the floor and the pizza burn on my toes.

Colorado Forced to Bleed The Fifth.. by Boston Globe reporter (this was the most hysterical part of the game for me)

Colorado forced to bleed the fifth
By Kevin Paul Dupont, Globe Staff October 25, 2007

The Rockies were already in a fine pickle well before the Red Sox came to the plate in the fifth inning of last night's World Series opener.

But they quickly went from pickled to jarred.

The Red Sox, their lead up to 6-1 after Jason Varitek's two-run double in the fourth, poured it on in the fifth with seven runs, three of those courtesy of consecutive walks issued by Colorado reliever Ryan Speier. The free passes, issued to Julio Lugo, Jacoby Ellsbury, and Dustin Pedroia, painfully and inexorably boosted the Boston lead to 13-1.

"It gives us a lot of confidence," said Lugo, knowing the psychological benefit inherent in a 17-hit barrage. "We know we can beat anybody. We just have a lot of good players and good hitters.

When you have them contributing like this, I'm never surprised."

"We can score in bunches," added Pedroia, who opened the night's offense with a leadoff homer. "It doesn't matter who's up [at the plate]."

Speier, who entered the fifth with two outs and the bases loaded, left after Pedroia's free ticket brought in J.D. Drew for the unlucky, if not cruel, No. 13. Matt Herges entered as the frame's third hurler.

When the fifth was complete, mercifully brought to an end by Kevin Youkilis's routine fly to right, all that remained for the Fenway Faithful was to sit patiently and see the night through to its inevitable conclusion.

Lugo, long before he accepted the first of Speier's free passes, began the inning with a single up the middle off lefthanded reliever Franklin Morales. Jeff Francis started for the Rockies, but the pride of Vancouver, British Columbia, exited after four innings, hammered for a half-dozen runs on 10 hits.

Morales appeared to be in half-decent shape after the single, getting Ellsbury to force Lugo at second and then retiring Pedroia on a pop to shortstop.

But soon after he was charged with a balk - caught cheating his motion toward home before firing to first in an attempt to pick off Ellsbury - the roof came crashing down on Morales.

"It doesn't get called too often," said the fleet Ellsbury, reflecting on the balk. "I thought he did [commit the balk], but . . . I wasn't going to argue it. When it was called, I was obviously pleased."

Youkilis capitalized with a sharp double to left that plated Ellsbury (7-1). Next, David Ortiz hammered a double to center, bringing the hard-charging Youkilis all the way around from first (8-1). Manny Ramírez followed with a sharp single to left, driving in Ortiz (9-1) for his second RBI of the night.

Had a late arrival just wandered through Fenway's gates, it might have looked as if the Sox were taking an extended batting practice session. Morales kept bringing it, and the Sox kept slapping him around.

Mike Lowell, No. 5 in the order, followed and drilled a double to left, putting runners at second and third.

Varitek then drew a walk, juicing the bases for the revived Drew, who promptly delivered a single to center that allowed Ramírez to trot in from third (10-1).

Drew's hit was the end of the night for Morales. The big lefty went from early promise (two outs, man on first) to a final line that read right out of a hardball horror flick: 2/3 IP, 6 H, 7 ER, 1 BB, and 1 balk.

Enter Speier. More horror.

Lugo, who led off the inning, drew the first bases-loaded walk, bringing in Lowell (11-1). Next came Ellsbury for walk No. 2, forcing home Varitek (12-1). And then came Pedroia. The pint-sized second baseman accepted walk No. 3 and the lead was up to a dozen.

It all looked almost too easy.

"No, definitely not," said Pedroia. "This game today, a lot of our guys got good at-bats . . . with a lot of hits and a lot of walks. And with that combination, you're going to score some runs."

Short But Sweet Wednesday

Matthew's cold is in high gear and I thought he would be going to school today. Instead we stayed home and brought out the nebulizer. Every year around this time it's needed and then knock on wood, we will be good for the rest of the year...

Good News today though is last night I finally got my pics uploaded to the computer. There were pictures as far back as August. I haven't been that bad since we lived in the apartment when our addition was being done and sometimes didn't have adequate computer access.

If you scroll down my blog to the first few days of October, you'll see my first picture of my punkin' in the punkin patch in 2003.

Here is the one from a few weeks ago, same pathetic punkin patch.

BUT WHAT A CUTE PUNKIN!!

What Is This World Coming To?

Alright, I know I have been warned from staying away from watching the news in the past, but I'm sorry, when disaster happens, I feel it for every person that is suffering. I always think of those moms, those families, those babies, those dads...just like us -they are all human with the same dreams.

Yesterday I was horrified as I watched CNN update on the wildfires in San Diego. I quickly went to my friend Debbie at A Charmed Life who lives in that area and Thank You God she is right now in Florida, struggling with other horrible life challenges while juggling a little girl and her father with Alzheimer's returning from Sicily. I am always checking out her blog and updating myself on how things are going in her life but am always in a rush to comment or Matthew will be screaming in the background for something and so I'll say - later ...I'll get back to her. I do that alot and then I don't get back but not because I don't want to let them know I'm listening..because I'm always so distracted.

Debbie here is a big hug..put those Italian arms around yourself and squeeze. I hope you survive everything you are facing with the strength that I know you have.

I am praying for all of those families in CA, along with the families across the country that face devastation every day either man made or Mother Nature related.

Just to keep you all posted. I'm a nervous mom and Matthew after visiting his pediatrician yesterday is ok..just a coincidence of a cold and fever at the same time MRSA was hitting his school. The bite is still unknown but at this time nothing to be concerned about.

Ugh.....MRSA bug and other Ugh! issues

That's all I can come up with for my title today.

Guess I'll have times like this when my mind is a blank to describe what I want to say.

Ugh! Says it all this morning.

It all started the other day when we witnessed that accident on the way home from school. The following day we learned that the 90 year old woman driving the car that smashed into the tree had passed away. The driver of the accident survived but was injured.

Passing through the area the following day, there was no sign, no marks left on that huge tree or even tire marks in the grass, that a life had passed away there. She later died at the hospital, but the fact that it seemed so calm, so serene again being the quaint little New England common that it is, was deceiving now to me.

She is now with my mom and the angels.

On Thursday afternoon, we had a call from the Superintendent of our school's mentioning that the horrific MRSA bug killing children throughout the country, had been found in our school and that they would clean the school that night and to await a letter they would put in the mail to parents.

Freaking out and frantic, I wasn't going to wait for that letter to come in the mail and eventually found it the next morning on the school's website.

The letter mentioned that it is important to realize that it is not an airborne virus. It is also important to know that in most cases, direct skin to skin contact or direct contact to skin drainage the wound of someone who is infected with the bacteria.

Not much help to me at the time, since I had no idea if this was someone in Matthew's classroom. Within 24 hours I found out that it was a little girl in second grade and after frantically reading up on this bug, I found that the playground equipment or the halls in the school, might be the only contact Matthew might make. Although who knows. She could have a sibling and he could be a playmate of Matthew's in school. I still don't know. I know she is now in a hospital in Boston and we are all praying for her and her family.

A four year old little girl in Concord NH, passed away due to this bug just last week and now with Matthew's school, there is four schools in MA where it has shown up in the last few weeks.

I've always been a nervous mom, this isn't helping me.

The symptoms they mention to look for are:

• If your child develops a sore or infection that seems to get worse rather than heal, contact your physician.
• They usually appear as pimples, boils or abscesses' and may be taken for spider bites. (again living on a lake, this isn't helping in the nervous dept for me)

The best and only defense for us as moms is to strongly encourage personal hygiene. Even more than we already do. Matthew I know has a habit of turning on the cold water and soap and out in 5 seconds, so I'm really getting on him now. I mentioned that a little girl got sick and that it is so important and hopefully when he gets back to school tomorrow the teachers will also be watching every move they make. My biggest problem with Matthew is - he is all boy. Hands are always going, from the nose, to other areas we won't discuss on my blog. He is always being a boy and when I tell him not to, he smiles and does it again because he is loving gross things right now at his age. And not to mention he developed a small fever on Friday and yesterday a pimple/spider bite thingy on his arm.......if it is not gone by tomorrow afternoon, I'm calling the pediatrician just to have her erase hopefully my fears of what could be a normal bite.

Ugh!

To distract me a little, I was re posting some items for sale on Craigslist. I really am trying to make a little Disney Fund Cash right now and we have some larger items that we are ready to get rid of.

One of them has been my beautiful hutch that Eric got me a few years ago when we moved back into our house, after the addition was done. Unfortunately, because the width of our dining area isn't as large with the hutch there and the table, we have it in the living room. It just doesn't work there and with all our other paraphernalia and Matthew's toys it is looking really cramped.

I had a girl call me on Friday and she was so excited. Because I posted not only a picture of the hutch, but also dimensions I thought I was good in providing everything necessary to make the sale.

I asked her if she was interested in it when she came would she be prepared to take it with her that same day. She said she would and she would bring cash and her boyfriend and his big F250 truck. I said then I would empty all of my stuff out of it then.

Last night I watched the Red Sox game, having an awesome time watching that 3rd inning and feeling that my staying awake had alot to do with it. I lasted until the 8th inning and decided because she was coming this morning, I would clean early in the morning.

She called this morning at 8 am all bright eyed and bushy tailed, my mother (I know) had to nudge me out of my sleep to faintly hear the phone downstairs in the distance. I got up and she was excited and would have a 45 minute drive and so we all got up and cleaned the house. Well Eric and I did, while Matthew lied on the couch. Eric did an awesome job cleaning the counters, the back deck while I cleaned the hutch and vacuumed, moved our trucks to the top of the street for this big F250 that would come down our drive.

I should have known by the way they parked up on the street, that something was amiss.

They came in smiling but so quiet. I didn't think it was the same bubbly anxious girl that I talked to on the phone. I felt awkward at there quietness. Eric did too and eventually went out to take pictures of the lake foliage to give them some room.

Then they smiled and she said Ok..we have a few more today to look at. I'm not sure it is going to fit in the space we need...Thanks though.

UGH!!!!

When they left, Matthew said "Mommy, Did They Give You The Money??" (He knows this is his Disney Fund).

Talk about UGH and disappointment. I just can't believe my luck sometimes.

Well, hopefully this week at school will be a safe one.

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE DO THIS FOR MY FRIENDS & FAMILY THAT HAVE BEEN AFFECTED BY BREAST CANCER

One of my dearest and most sweetest, childhood, bestest most loved friends in the world asked me to send this in an email...email's don't do justice like a blog does:-)

PLEASE DO THIS!

A favor to ask, it only takes a minute....

Please tell ten friends to tell ten today!

The BreastCancer site is having trouble getting enough people to click on their sitedaily to meet their quota of donating at least one free mammogram a day to anunderprivileged woman.

It takes less than a minute to go to their site and clickon ' donating a mammogram' for free (pink window in the middle).

This doesn't cost you a thing.

Their corporatesponsors /advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate mammogram in exchangefor advertising.

Here's the web site!

Pass it along to people you know.

http://www.thebreastcancersite.com/

I FIGURED I ONLY HAVE LESS THAN 10 FRIENDS, SO THIS WOULD BE MY WAY OF CONTRIBUTING TO THIS CAUSE, MORE PEOPLE VIEW MY SITE.

ICE campaign - In Case of Emergency - IRONY OF TODAY

Well, the irony of this is I am shaking right now as I type this. I just got back from picking Matthew up from school, and I got this email from my brother on the ICE campaign.

The other day while I was foolishly blogging about Tom Brady, I wound up being two minutes late for Matthew's school. I am a horrible mom and have felt the guilt of it since the moment I realized I have to get off the computer and go pick him up. I rushed through town (only a 3 minute drive) and almost got into an accident with a lady in my blind spot.

I made it there in time to have all of the other moms gone and Matthew waiting patiently looking through the glass doors at me as I drove up to the school. His teacher wasn't concerned as I apologized but I was astonished because usually there are still moms lurking around for 10 minutes and this morning, there wasn't. I have never felt so guilty in my life.

This morning, miracles happen for some strange reason and it is something the way things go. All it takes is one second, one minute and it can all come to an end.

I was talking to my best friend K in PA who I hadn't talked to in 3 months. I was determined not to be late so I casually and slowly got to his school 10 minutes early (like every other time) and talked to her on my cell phone in the car. I told her I love her and that I'm always thinking of her and wish I could be there to give her a hug.

I got out of the car at 10:58 when other moms started to show up and hung out right in front for Matthew to see me. A teacher peeked her head out of the door mentioning that school picture day is taking a little longer and that it would probably be another 10 minutes for them to come out. I joked with a few moms about being late the other day and now I'm early and he will be late. We joked about going to the dentist office and being late and being early and then waiting a long time.

Matthew ran out of the door ten minutes later and we headed slowly towards the car. He wanted to go play in the playground and I was trying to convince him first of going home to change his school picture day clothes first. He had on a nice pair of tan pants that I didn't want getting ruined. I told him we'll have lunch, get into play clothes and then head back out to a playground. He was sad because he saw his little friend there and wanted to stay and play.

I bumped into his other little friend L and his mom who was scurrying around like a mad hatter trying to get to her car, she had an important date and said she was having one of those mornings as she passed by smiling.

As I pulled out of the parking lot, taking a left onto the street and began to drive, out of nowhere a police cruiser stormed past me lights blaring and immediately speeding to somewhere.

As I got to the end of the road, where I would normally go through our quaint little common, it had 3 police cars and lights glaring so I took a quick right to avoid what looked like an accident that had just happened. It didn't look like much at first so I turned around a few blocks down to head back in that direction because that was the way I needed to go.

I got closer and witnessed a minivan with RI plates that had been hit horribly in the drivers side front end. The woman driving seemed to be already out of her car and on her cell phone. Matthew was watching so I was trying to keep my emotions down as I was witnessing this. I then saw another car. A four door later model blue car. It was completely smashed head on into a 300 year old oak tree. Policemen were inside the car trying to help but that was all I saw.

My husband told me once that once a tree is hit, that's it. It doesn't move or sway the way another car or another object might. The damage I saw and that I hope Matthew didn't comprehend, was devastating. There was debris everywhere and I drove slowly through glass and headed home.

I'm sick to my stomach, thanking God that I do Thank Him every night for my son, Thanking him that I told K how much I loved her, thanking Him for not having me be in that spot at that time this morning, thanking Him for Eric's calm and understanding voice on the phone.

Hug the ones you love, tell the ones you love that you're sorry or whatever you need, because in just one breath that's it.

When I witnessed my mom passing I had 25 years to prepare and knew it was coming. It was the most horrible thing anyone could ever witness.

To see someone possibly pass away right before my eyes as I drove by, it's so unfair and so devastating to me. Did that person tell their family they loved them? Were they going to school also to pick up their preschool or school age child or did they pick them up and were they in the car? Did they have anyone in their life that will notice that they are gone?

I am praying for the people this morning affected in this accident and their families and other tragedies that happen every day that because we don't see them, we forget that they happen.

Here is the ironic email I got from my brother when I got home:

ICE campaign - 'In Case of Emergency'

We all carry our mobile phones with names & numbers stored in its memory but nobody, other than ourselves, knows which of these numbers belong to our closest family or friends.

If we were to be involved in an accident or were taken ill, the people attending us would have our mobile phone but wouldn't know who to call.

Yes, there are hundreds of numbers stored but which one is the contact person in case of an emergency? Hence this ' ICE' (In Case of Emergency) Campaign

The concept of 'ICE' is catching on quickly.

It is a method of contact during emergency situations.

As cell phones are carried by the majority of the population, all you need to do is store the number of a contact person or persons who should be contacted during emergency under the name 'ICE' ( In Case Of Emergency).

The idea was thought up by a paramedic who found that when he went to the scenes of accidents, there were always mobile phones with patients, but they didn't know which number to call.

He therefore thought that it would be a good idea if there was a nationally recognized name for this purpose.

In an emergency situation, Emergency Service personnel and hospital Staff would be able to quickly contact the right person by simply dialing the number you have stored as 'ICE'.

Please forward this. It won't take too many 'forwards' before everybody will know about this. It really could save your life, or put a loved one's mind at rest.

What you see AND What you don't see

This is as good as it gets these days for a picture of Mommy & Matthew. Taken by the moms Meetup group that I am part of.

We went to an unbelievable (thank God we had a group discount or I would have been disappointed) farm with our wonderful new friend N and her son R and other moms that are also apart of this same group.

Tougas Farm was actually beautiful with some animals and a really cool playground with an upper boardwalk type ramp for the goats to climb over (really cool), a tractor ride into a pumpkin patch, some apple cider and apple donuts.

My favorite part of the whole moment was entering this town, I was in PA. The beautiful leaves on the trees with the beautiful hills (not mountains) surrounding little valleys and it was a sunny day, to boot!

As you can see by my attire, I am sporting Eric's Patriots hat these days. I need more hats but right now, I don't have that luxury. I only have maybe one more month and my hair should be all one length again and I can stop wearing my hats all together.

I can't win, today I overdressed us. Home was nippy and the weatherman called for 58 degrees in Northboro, MA so I thought I was all set, sporting a nice turtleneck and fleece jacket and Matthew in his sweater and turtleneck with a jean jacket on. He later threw that at me.

After leaving the farm, we headed toward home and decided to have a "Friendly" lunch with coupon and to buy some much needed long sleeve shirts and sweaters for Matthew. Tomorrow is school picture day so we are now all set.

He went on some Spiderman and Batman rides also today so he is now satisfied and watching Frosty the Snowman as he anticipates Christmas.

He was awesome in traffic on the way to the farm today. He didn't care. He was mentioning what a beautiful day it was, what a beautiful truck that was, what a beautiful car that was. I mentioned that was nice and that he was my beautiful little boy. He said Thanks Mom. Your my beautiful Big Girl.

The other day he told me I was beautiful and I almost broke down and cried because I was the farthest thing from it.

After we left Friendly's and clothes shopping, he mentioned how beautiful today was, how it was such a great day to go to the farm, on the tractor, pick a pumpkin, have lunch at Friendly's with Monster Mash ice cream, go on Spiderman, go on Batman, go on Dump Truck rides and then buy some shirts....what a beautiful day...sigh...

He is so funny.

We are comparing his little life to ours growing up. We mention how, No,Our Moms didn't have us in playgroups, playdates, this park and that zoo.

But we also agree that the difference is, the moms now all work or most of them do. There are no family's hanging out on the block playing kickball. At least not in my neighborhood. And most moms agree with me that when you have large family in the area, that forms your child's family network, it is totally different and you are not spending every waking moment trying to fill that void.

Many children today (Unfortunately) don't have "that" family network, that social network and if they are an only child (chosen or not to be) they need rewarding and fulfilling moments to help add opportunities for them to be the most special person that they can be. By just sitting by and not creating positive moments in their lives, it's like you just want to leave it up to the world to create who your child is going to be.

I'm having too much fun, tears, rewards, crying, laughing, loving, proud mom moments now to give it up.

This has been my reward for being that stay at home mom.

I can't not post this today (after explaining to Matthew that Mommy loves Daddy but has a crush on Tom Brady-like him a cinderella in the movie)

From SI:

Overdue accolade for Brady

Patriots QB well on his way to winning first NFL MVP

Posted: Sunday October 14, 2007 10:15PM; Updated: Sunday October 14, 2007 10:35PM

Tom Brady threw a career-high five touchdowns to lead the Patriots to a 48-27 win over the Cowboys.
Ronald Martinez /Getty Images

IRVING, Texas -- He'd never admit it in a thousand NFL Sundays, but for more than a few years now Tom Brady has chafed at the only slight he feels he's endured throughout his illustrious eight-year career.

The popular perception is that Brady has won it all, and done it all. And that's close to the truth. But never has the New England Patriots all-world quarterback won the NFL's Most Valuable Player award.

To be sure, Brady has earned a little satisfaction by beating a slew of league MVPs after they bagged the award. Just ask San Diego's LaDainian Tomlinson, Indy's Peyton Manning, St. Louis's Kurt Warner and Tennessee's Steve McNair. But with the emphasis in New England always, always, always on winning within the framework of the team concept, Brady hasn't amassed the kind of gaudy statistics that earn check marks on MVP voters' ballot.

Before now, that is. Before this season of domination being turned in by both Brady and an offense that looks as close to unstoppable as we've ever seen it.

No more calls, please. We have a winner. Your 2007 NFL MVP winner is wearing No. 12 for New England, and wearing out the rest of the league on a week-by-week basis. The latest round of results are in, and they echo what started becoming apparent from day one of this season. Brady is a man on a mission, and he's taking his Patriots along for the very memorable ride.

"It's truly amazing what he's doing, but the numbers don't lie,'' Patriots veteran safety Rodney Harrison said of Brady's day in New England's 48-27 showdown win against Dallas, the much-hyped duel of unbeatens in Texas Stadium. "I've had a chance to play with Ryan Leaf, and I've had the chance to play with Tom Brady, and every time I see him I want to give him a hug.''
What Harrison is really trying to wrap his arms around are the almost absurd numbers that Brady is rolling up this season. On Sunday against the NFC's last remaining undefeated team, he strafed the Cowboys for a career-best five touchdown passes -- a sixth was called back by penalty -- completing 31 of 46 passes for 388 yards, with no interceptions and a 129.6 passer rating.


With the receiving corps of his dreams on full display -- a feast after last season's Reche Caldwell and Doug Gabriel populated famine -- Brady found four teammates for touchdowns against the Cowboys. Slot receiver Wes Welker caught a career-high two touchdowns and notched his first 100-yard receiving game as a pro. Brady also connected on scoring throws once each with Randy Moss, DonteStallworth and Kyle Brady.

That onslaught gives Brady a staggering 21 touchdown passes in just six games this season (3.5 per game). On that pace, he'll finish with 56 scoring passes, obliterating Manning's NFL record of 49, set in 2004. Brady ducked any thought of chasing Manning's mark when asked about it in the post-game, but it would be sweet revenge for a quarterback who has always wondered what it would be like to have Manning's receivers and Manning's good fortune of having the same offense and the same offensive coordinator throughout his entire NFL career.

"I've always said, 'Peyton Manning has his receivers, why can't Tom Brady have his?' '' said Moss, who finished with six catches for 59 yards against the Cowboys, with a 6-yard first-drive scoring catch that got the Patriots started toward victory. "The only thing we're happy about is we're 6-0 and we came to Dallas and made it happen. There was a lot of hype coming into this week.''

That there was, but it's almost impossible at this point to over-hype the performance level of Brady and the Patriots passing game. Has an offseason shopping spree -- Moss, Welker and Stallworth were all new acquisitions -- ever had these kind of early returns? Brady is playing machine-like, making every throw a quarterback can be expected to make, and his confidence level appears at an all-time high. Even his teammates have run out of superlatives to describe the zone he seems locked into.

"Obviously it's going pretty well so far,'' Patriots offensive left tackle Matt Light said. "He's doing the things he's always done, but you just don't see many guys doing what he does on game days.''
Brady actually did his best work after he and the Patriots were forced to deal with some rare adversity this season. After surging to leads of 14-0 at the end of the first quarter and 21-10 late in the first half, New England actually trailed the comeback-minded Cowboys 24-20 almost five minutes into the third quarter. But there was no flinching by Brady and the Pats, who went on to score 27 of the game's final 30 points, burying Dallas's upset dreams.

New England's final five drives went touchdown, field goal, touchdown, field goal, touchdown. The exclamation point was the 1-yard touchdown plunge by rookie fullback Kyle Eckel with 19 seconds remaining, a score met with an unusual amount of emotion by the generally business-like Brady. No doubt it was a message sent that the Patriots would show no mercy this season, especially when facing a team that some deemed ready to play on a level field with the three-time Super Bowl champions.

"This team, we're not going to panic when we get behind,'' Patriots linebacker Tedy Bruschi said. "It's Game 6 of the season. It was a good opponent, but we've won some big games around here. We know how to play in big games.''

The Cowboys sacked Brady three times, as many sacks as he had absorbed all season coming into Sunday. But even though the Patriots had no rushing game to speak of -- they gained 75 yards on 29 carries, a 2.6 average -- Brady and the passing game still did anything it wanted to.
"We work hard,'' Moss said. "Tom Brady does not let us lollygag in practice every day. I'm not saying we're unstoppable, but.....''

But nothing. Brady's five touchdown passes was his sixth consecutive game with three or more to start this season, breaking SteveYoung's 1998 record. New England also has scored at least 34 points in all six games this season, and with 230 points thus far, it's averaging a mind-boggling 38.3 per game. If the Patriots keep that pace up, they'll finish with 613 points, which would beat the 1998 Minnesota Vikings' NFL one-season scoring record of 556 points by 57.

For Brady, the history that he's helping write doesn't stop there. Sunday marked his 100th career regular season start, and he's now 76-24 in those games. That tied RogerStaubach's NFL record for the best 100-game start to a career, and Brady did it on the same field that Roger the Dodger made his name.

"It's really early in the season,'' said Brady, deflecting all talk of records and making history. "The reality is that it's a win on the road and we're 6-0. Any time we're wining, I'm doing just fine.''

Brady's doing more than fine. He's the NFL's MVP so far this season, and showing absolutely no signs of letting any one catch up to him or his high-flying Patriots. He's always had the victories. But this year, he has the receivers, and the kind of overwhelming statistics that win MVP awards.

I'd say let's just give it to him right now, but of course Brady won't go for that. He's having entirely too much fun earning it his way.


(Now if Mommy could just sit down with Daddy and actually watch the game)

Anyone have any tips on keeping warm for the mama over here on the lake?

Alright I know I am a daily wimp but there has to be an answer out there somewhere, without keeping the heat on 24/7.

I'm not complaining. I'm not complaining. I'm not complaining. I love my house that my husband built. I'm not complaining. I'm not complaining. It's kind of like I think I can, I think I can...maybe if I say it often enough somehow I'll just make myself warm. I'm in Hawaii, I'm in Hawaii, I'm in Hawaii.

This is a picture of our little house, a million years ago before we did the addition:

As you can see the lake is 100 feet behind the house, and with old windows it was unbearable in the winter. We have a nice wood stove in the basement but unless we keep it always on it is still crazy down there. That is one of our next projects. Right up there with the garage. We would like to have like a family/game/hobby room down there with a nice big screen projector for movies for Mommy and Daddy to watch after Matthew goes to sleep, but not yet.

Now here are the pictures before the final painting was done. It is now all yellow and so beautiful, but for some reason with the lake being close and the amount of windows we put in, I am always cold. The temperature here is always 10 degrees colder than up the street and sometimes more shadier, so it is deceiving until you get off of our road and then it's like your in another world.

So like I said, due to how beautiful my house turned out, who am I to complain? I'm not complaining about the house. I'm complaining about my skinny body that has the incapacity to be warm. Eric will tell me to just put layers on or get under the covers. But then I don't get out of the covers and if I put anymore layers on, I'm going to start looking like an onion.

And it's only October 15Th:-) If you don't hear from me in a few months, send the people to peel the onion.

To get off of the subject, this morning Matthew was again so wonderful getting ready for school. He actually is reminding me now of stuff that I need to do for him, which is awesome. This morning, he was pointing to my kitchen window saying he needed the spiderman things!! I'm looking with a blank face at the window clueless as to what he was talking about because Spiderman isn't there and there is no Halloween spider webs. Finally he started pointing like a madman, claiming Mommy!!! My Spiderman things!!! I need them!!! And then the fog cleared and I saw that he had been pointing to his vitamins!! Yeah!!!! He asked me for his vitamins!!

Little things make me happy.

On the way to school he announced something funny. The other night when he wasn't around I mentioned to Eric that I wanted to go to PA for at least my mother's birthday to go to her grave. I haven't been there since August and I thought even if I just disappear and go myself for two days, it's OK. Matthew mentioned to me as were driving to school "Mommy, Maybe we can go see Grandpa and R in Pennsylvania sometime?" I told him how sweet that was but to remember that R lives in NJ and she would have to be visiting Grandpa and we would have to talk to her and plan it. I then mentioned that Mommy was thinking of going soon and that I was going to go by myself, but if he wanted to join me because he missed Pennsylvania that he could come too. He then said "I do miss Pennsylvania Mommy, I go with you."

So I guess that is planned.

Well my fingers have gotten a little warmer by typing, but now I have to go get him from school.

Mommy's Friday Recap Week In Review

Alright little one, this is going to be a weekly tradition. I guess I'm giving up my Fantasy Friday's for awhile.

I think other than Disney World right now, that is our main fantasy and I am hoping before your next birthday that we get there. I am working on it.

• Last Friday night, we got a knock on our door and when you opened it I wish I could have captured your face and your surprise. It was Princess N and Grammy R. You hadn't seen Princess N now in 3 months and we all were going through withdrawal. When you opened the door, you said " N WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE???!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!" You wound up spending an hour with her and we were busy making plans for Saturday. We went to an unbelievable animal farm called Winslow Animal Farm The website does not do it justice. You love animals and Halloween and the farm was all decorated with haunted mazes and scary decorations around every corner. You loved every thing and were especially touched by the horse (that was deformed & abused) named Hershey. He was a chocolate brown color and you were petting him. They take such wonderful care of all of the animals and really show them alot of love and I think the animals loved being petted and sometimes chased by you. When we came home from the farm, Mommy made the most pathetic scarecrow for you with a number 12 on his shirt. I thought that stuffing it with old sheets was ok, but Daddy soon corrected it on Sunday....throwing his arm over there and his feet over there and his head over there (just like the flying monkeys) and then re-stuffed it with leaves. Thank you Daddy because now it really does look good and you can see the whole body from the street!
• Monday was your very first school holiday (well not counting last year). You are too little to understand Columbus Day and with the week of rain that the forecaster was planning, Mommy made some play dates with your new friends from school. Unfortunately your little friend R------ had a bad cold and needed to be healthy for his birthday on Wednesday so we are going to have them over in the next week or so. Mommy's brain is all mushy that I can't even remember what we then did.
• Tuesday we were all excited because your little friend L--- and his little sister and Mom were coming over. Mommy is getting a little overwhelmed with school dates, play dates and the weather, that I forgot that we were supposed to go to a park that day with another meetup group we joined. L--- and you are a little alike in that you are both little Irishmen and have the same only boy, independent, toughness about you. He is a nice boy though that likes to work on real cars in his garage with his Dad. He is working on a Chevelle that his Dad is going to give him when he gets older. I mentioned that is a reason why we want to fix our garage because Daddy can't wait to make and work on go-carts and build things with you. Ever since Tuesday you have been pointing out all of the Ford trucks on the road. We were all amazed by L---'s ability to spell GMC on our refrigerator with our letter magnets and that he knew we drove Fords. hehe
• Wednesday, you could not get out of the car fast enough when I drove you to school. You didn't care that it was drizzling out. You missed being in school now for almost a whole week due to the holiday and you just couldn't wait to run to R------ and yell HAPPY BIRTHDAY R!!!!!! You also mentioned to me as we were pulling up, that someone was waiting for you. A certain little girl you had a crush on last year for the 3 months you were in another preschool who is now in your class. The funny thing is last year, you would have me roll down the windows in the car as we were leaving to yell Goodbye to this little girl and you would run to her to swing next to her on the swings. Last year, she could care less. This year Mommy is noticing the way she hides behind her mom's legs and smiles at us and the way she is when your around. Your getting through to her, but you aren't tied down now and you still notice the other pretty little girls in your class. You are starting to ask less and less for Princess N and with her being away for 3 months, you hadn't asked for her in at least 2. I think that you are growing up and realizing that not only does she live far away but also you have other fish in the sea just like she does in her school. Today (Friday) we saw her at the library and she was with a bunch of friends that were in story time and I heard her say why don't we have my friend Matthew play. But we weren't there for long. We also ran into R------ and his mom. You said "Mom!! Look!! R's here at the library!!!!" He is having his birthday week with family from Maryland and Virginia so he is busy this week.
• Thursday you came home with some art work you did with leaves. The theme for the week. You expressed your concern because L--- was the calender boy and you wanted to do it. I mentioned that due to the names it seemed they are going in alphabetical order and I bet next week you will be calender boy. You also brought home the books I ordered you from Scholastic books called Diego's phonics and 3 little books about feelings. You were so excited and couldn't wait to get the plastic off of them. We made a little bat yesterday that we got at ACMoore. Mommy was disappointed because it was missing an eye ball and 6 little cord strings that you bead onto. I had another eyeball but it put a damper into our bat making. But that is what you get for a dollar. Last night when Daddy got home you pulled out your paints and did the most beautiful painting. You could sit and paint, playdoh, paint and make crafts from morning til night.
• Today we had a play date with the twins who we also had not seen in two weeks. We went to their house to play and we were wonderfully surprised when their mom brought out Halloween stickers and paper bags to decorate. Again you were in your glory and then you got to play for another hour so we had fun. She also gave Mommy an awesome Halloween poem that you attach to the bags with goodies on them, and then ring the doorbell and run at the neighbors. Really cute. We then went to the library where for some reason you didn't want Mommy to get a book, but then seeing R and S from school you forgot about your little mood and had fun. We wound up getting enough books for two months, with two movies and Mommy got alot of landscaping books to learn about shade planting and perennials and when to plant and how to plant what and where. Right now you are patiently waiting for me to make dinner while you watch a Disney movie. You are being the most wonderful son and I love you giving me this time.

I know you have a million funny things in this week that I want to get out, but I have to make dinner so I am going to go now.

GO RED SOX AND PATRIOTS!!!!

SLOW COOKING THURSDAY

Alright two blogs in one day. Who cares?

I really am trying to get organized and one part of my "working on self" is working on meal planning and actual dinners that we eat as a family.

Today we are having Crockpot Recipe - CHILI II found on www.my-crockpot-recipes.com

Ingredients: 1 lb ground beef, cooked and rinsed

60-70 ounces rinsed light or dark kidney beans

16 ounces tomato paste

16 ounces peeled chopped tomatoes (reserve liquid)

1/2 small onion, chooped

1 small green pepper, chopped

1 package chili seasonings

cayenne pepper to taste, if desired

Directions: Okay, now the hard part, put it all in the crockpot and cook on low until you are ready, I'd recommend at least 5 hours so the peppers and onions are cooked soft. Use the reserved tomato liquid if it seems too thick for your taste. We serve with tortillas, cheese, sour cream, and salsa! Mmmmmmmmmmmm

This will allow Mommy to be able to do arts and crafts all afternoon. And due to none in the house on this yucky day, we are skipping the green pepper:-)

Back In Time - Because I'm still not able to upload from my camera

I am going through withdrawal. I need a desk where I can be organized. Without my printer being hooked up there is no way for me to upload my pictures to the computer, so I am digging out from the archives.

I have so much on my mind again that I want to post about but now it is getting late and I have to pick up Matthew from school and it is now down pouring. yuck...

This was his first pumpkin patch. My little punkin in the punkin patch.

Mommy's letter to Matthew (week in review)

Dear Matthew,

This week you made Mommy so proud. You had a busy week at school and play dates with some new and old friends.

You are really doing great at keeping us both busy.

While you're building your own friendships, you unknowingly are making friends for Mommy (the moms of your new friends).

You are so outgoing, personable and caring that I know you are going far in life with these qualities alone.

In one week, we've gone to the playground with the triplets and her sister, to school, to have lunch and play with a new schoolmate and her twin brothers and today to a wonderful little zoo and playground that we love with R and N and their mom.

You had such a wonderful time and you and R are becoming such good buddies. You even thanked him for inviting you to his "Scooby Doo Party" next week. As usual, your loving ways with N, touched her heart and mine. I'm told you are number #2 on her birthday list in January.

You made a Red Sox Buddie at school while celebrating Red Sox week.

They are in the playoffs again and tonight Daisuke Matsuzaka will be pitching against the Angel's. Everyone in MA is cheering them on. Your Red Sox Buddie is so cute with the body of a baseball that you drew and cut out with your scissors. It is right up in the window next to our Halloween decorations for the world to see. Last week you made a really cute green wiggly worm because it was Apple Week.

You are loving the songs you learn everyday. Sometimes you remember the words, but sometimes you don't. That's ok, because you also have the uncanny ability to come up with your own words. The other day in the car you sang a song about Mickey Mouse.

When Mommy told you how much I loved that song, you mentioned "Every time I look at something, my brain makes me want to sing".

I taught you the word "INSPIRATION".

I explained that inspiration is what Mommy used to have, when she would write her own lyrics 20 years ago. I said that for Mommy though, I needed a moment on the riverbank with a notebook and pen and no distractions for my creativity to flow. I told you that you don't have that problem, you have the talent of immediate creativity to create that song.

Sometime before today is done, we are making that scarecrow that Mommy promised and decorate the front of the house with that little bale of hay I bought. You really are loving this season and having fun doing anything arts and crafts.

Over the weekend, you and Daddy made two black construction paper projects with Halloween velvet stickers on them and they came out awesome!

Last but not least. Yesterday I asked you again (for the millionth time) if you would marry Mommy? You mentioned (for the millionth time) no, that I'm married to Daddy. I said "But I want to be married to both of you".

You said "I CAN'T MOMMY...................................DADDY LOVED YOU FIRST.."

I LOVE YOU HONEY.
THANK YOU FOR BEING MY MIRACLE AND MY WORLD.
Love
Mommy

xoxoxox

Happy Birthday M......!!!!!

I didn't forget!!!!
Today you turn 18!!!
I can't believe it. You are going places. We wish you love, health and many, many happy years to come.
Today is also the feast day of St. Frances Of Assisi..fitting, since your mom and I both love him.
I love you.

Catching Up On My Reading - Remembering Infertility

A few weeks ago while at the library with Matthew, we ventured into an aisle for Mommy of "self -help" books. Although I've read alot over the years, I am always looking for ways to improve, learn and to nurture my soul. We found a place where Matthew could look at his books on the floor of the aisle I was in, while I quickly grabbed whatever grabbed my eye before he was finished reading his books.

One that immediately caught my eye, was by an author named Alice D. Domar, Ph.D. called Self-Nurture: Learning to Care for Yourself as Effectively as You Care for Everyone Else.

I had seen this wonderful woman when we were going through infertility at Beth Israel Deaconess Hospital in Brookline, MA. Her classes on meditation & relaxation for women going through the same stress' in life were remarkable. I left there with many meditation tapes with her soothing voice that eventually was the key I needed to complete my many intrusive exams at the time.

My body had become so anxiety ridden from numerous exams, blood work etc over the years that it was becoming to the point where I couldn't even have a pap smear. I found a wonderful doctor who is also into anything alternative to help in aiding patients and being a woman she is completely understanding. She let me listen to my tape for the 5 minutes I needed before the exam began and with alot of deep breathing and guided imagery while listening to the tape, I was in Ireland on the Cliffs Of Mohr and then it was done. I had never experienced anything so easy in my life.

After that I was able to finally do the exams where they took my eggs and eventually another exam where they would inseminate. The deep breathing and relaxation was the key to these as well.

My father in law had been mentioning to me for years about mind over matter. He introduced me to a book back in the early nineties by Herbert Benson (another pioneer of mind-over matter).

I used to just roll my eyes at some of his suggestions. I still do, but he knows that it is not with dis-respect but just a little deep for me at the moment. He had definitely hit a mark with his suggesting mind over matter.

One of my problems though is that once I got pregnant with Matthew, I forgot all about meditating and deep breathing. I thought I didn't need it anymore and after all I went through to get pregnant I wouldn't be rushing out the door for any more exams. God could take care of me for awhile.

The tapes and weekly charts of what I went through collected dust in my basement, where they still are. I have to get them out.

For some strange reason I didn't even pick up this book, until last night. I immediately read 60 pages all reminding me of the necessary means to take care of your mind, heart, soul and self.
I have been trying to go out more with moms that I have been meeting, I have been blogging more as a journal and therapeutic necessity for my creative self. I have been allowing myself my cup of iced coffee from Honey Dew Donuts, so I thought I am taking care of my "self". What I read though is about more than that.

The blogging/journals/writing is recommended due to (and I knew this) today's day and age of women more in the work force without family and friends around the corner, without community - this is their muse, their peace, their world, the place where everything they feel comes out and has a place.

While reading this I thought OK, I know what I'm talking about. I'm going to give you opinions of what I read last night...not exact quotes from the book (other's might take the meanings totally different from how I interpret it to my life).

She mentions though that if not taking the time to listen to your "self" for at least 45 minutes to an hour a day, which might include the relaxation and breathing exercises to help, everything in your life will suffer. From relationships to your every daily challenges and how we cope with small problems to major ones that we face.

She mentions how being a stay at home mom (not in the exact wording) face more depression issues, more anxiety issues, more illness, more social issues than a woman in the work force all day who then tries to juggle and balance family. The stigma is that women at home have the time to balance it all, but really there never is a balance. Women who work juggle more but due to them using there creative selves in the world, socializing with peers, just going out at lunch with a co-worker makes them less likely to get depression, anxiety, illness and social isolation.

She mentions that what we think might be balance in other peoples lives, just might be that there never is a balance. No one has balance. She also mentions that for women that stay home they (un-necessarily) expect more of the few relationships they do have and unknowingly put pressure on those people to achieve that expectation. She mentions that for the spouse of women at home, sometimes that spouse (due to the age we live in) then is supposed to be the husband, the father, the friend, the relative, the empty void that is missing with other relationships. The one who is to carry all of the weight and the financial burden of being the sole provider.

I know this is true for me. I don't want it to be true but it is. It wasn't my plan, but it seems that due to the age we live in, my staying home hasn't been the best for my relationships. Except Matthew. I really have to work on getting a job. Something that allows me to still be home, something that allows me to still be able to be there for Matthew. Today and tomorrow we have plans, but over the weekend I am going to work on my resume and just getting some of myself back into the real world. Maybe even finally finding a babysitter to go out with my husband on a date, would be a nice start.

I just ordered this book from Amazon so I have a copy to use and with my old tapes and maybe even a phone call to Dr. Ali, things will get easier.

Mommy's Aches & Pains Growing Up with a "chronic" illness - CAN ANYONE RELATE?

By the name of this post, some of you might roll your eyes and say oh no! Not again! Some might say, that's her an open book. Some might say, Shut Up Already! Some might say, me too.

I am hoping that some might open up to me as a woman who is a mom, and either share their challenges of being a women to help us all get through this thing called life.

Growing up watching my mother deteriorate from her illness, before she was diagnosed in 1991, we guessed what could possibly be wrong. The few times my mother agreed to go to a doctor, back in the 80's, they thought she drank too much caffeine and that maybe she should just switch to decaf. That is how unpopular her illness was in the area I was from. Only over the last few years with the Internet, were people able to branch out and see other's affected like themselves in different parts of the country and the world. To see that there was help out there for caregivers, societies to be involved in that do fundraising for research, to find other families with the same similar stories or backgrounds that you knew- they knew. Nothing else had to be said. They knew and you knew and you could just hug and breathe.

I have (due to my own scattered brain sometimes) limited amount of awareness about my mother's illness. Eric is better at understanding it from a medical point of view. He retains things better and can repeat it back to you 10 years later from a visit 10 years past, as if he was just there.

I think because of the upbringing and growing up watching your mother and family deteriorate with a chronic illness, might have definitely done something to my ability to fully emotionally develop to be able to deal with crisis', to deal with chaos and have some of the basic strengths other women have? I know that I had to step into "mother" frame of mind growing up worrying about my brothers and father. I am not complaining being the only girl, but the weight was on my shoulders (that I put there myself) to make things "right". My brothers and father and myself always had love from each other and that is still precedent today, but when everything was chaotic we all did what we could to survive that moment. One moment at a time. And now almost 25+ years later, it's like we have to pick up the pieces of our shattered selves that we had become and try to stay whole.

Over the past few years due to infertility, being 300+ miles from my "blood family" and childhood friends and relatives, watching my mother deteriorate, go into a nursing home, have a baby, be a motherless daughter even while she was still alive and then in Feb 2006 her to finally be at peace and marital issues I have suffered from major depressions.

Previously these were diagnosed as "Seasonal Affective Disorder", as "situational", as possibly "bi-polar", as "Hypothyroid" (which was found due to infertility), as Hashimoto's Disease which is a thyroid disease, as possibly "pmd" (severe PMS) due to my symptoms always getting worse anywhere between two weeks of the month.

I am still at a loss as to what "label" I should call myself.

I don't know what to do about it anymore.

I tried to start this blog for a million reasons, sharing my son with my family near and far, having a journal of and for him from me to see how much I loved him if God forbid one day I'm not there, to separate each of my "issues" to give them each a place where I could get them out of me and down on "paper", to help me stay connected to the outside world, to give me my creativity back as a human being, to give me my own little place that was mine while maybe making friends out there in the world who possibly can relate to any of this and so my corner of my room wouldn't become as isolated as my mother's had been.

My mother didn't have the Internet. She had well lost her capacity to verbalize, type, communicate by the time the computers came around. She was a victim of the "old world" that meant if it happened behind closed doors, no one would see or know so she suffered many years of pain and silence when the world outside was loud and happy, she wasn't seen or heard in her room day after day. My father was her major outside connection with the world, taking her out for rides just to get her to breathe the air, see the views. I don't know how it happened but it really was a miracle that she chose him in life and that he didn't give up.

Many people would say to me over the years, you're father was a saint. So many men would have given up and just walked away.

Thank You God that he didn't.

It's unbelievable that someone could love someone that much. There were frustrating times for him on a daily basis, but he never wavered from standing by her side or sitting by her side in the end even falling asleep at her feet of her bed at the nursing home.

The reason I started all of this rehashing today is simply this. It's that time of the month. My father and husband and brothers are now embarrassed by my coming out to the world about it, but I don't care.

It's a scary thought sometimes being a woman. Especially when I don't know what the heck is going on with me. And that I have to put on a smile all the time for my son or get myself up in the morning to get dressed and get through the day. It's a daily battle for me and I just want people to know that if I could take a pill to make myself "whole" I would. As it is I take Celexa for anxiety and Thyroid medicine.

This time I said some things to someone I love very much, that might have been more than hurtful.

That someone is my brother J.

He happened to call me a little name on the wrong day.

20 years worth of pain came out and he was the reciprocate of that pain.

He is the most wonderful father to his girls and the most wonderful uncle to his nephew, the most wonderful son to his father and the most wonderful brother to his sister.

I do not change the way I feel about certain issues, like wishing my son had family near by and his and my love for them. I can't change the way things are. That is why I constantly am the one traveling to PA or to wherever to make sure that I do my part for Matthew to have "family" or friends. I will continue to do it, because he needs to know his family in PA as much as his family in MA.

So I am getting off now because I have to find a way to shower. Eric took Matthew to school and then I have to go get him.

I really just wanted everything out there today because in my gut and in my heart, I have everything to fight for. A beautiful son, a husband and home and for my mom I'm not giving in to this womanly stuff without a battle a fight. I refuse to let one more winter go by, with me just sitting still through it.

oh yeah and don't forget that mountain called 40 in few months...

things are just a little bit much right now.

On The First Day Of October...

I gave to me.

An orange and black blog with cute little Casper the friendly ghost.

Alright, so I'm weird. I'm entitled. I have a four and a half year old little boy. I'm allowed now to do those things that I waited my whole life to do and people used to think I was weird then.

Now I have someone to show off my "child friendly" side.

Today October came in with a coldness that reminded me that I have to buy Matthew a winter coat, gloves and a hat soon.

Cold mornings, warm afternoons and cold evenings. I wish it would just make up it's mind. This morning I left for his school wearing a sweater and one of my new fall coats that I found on www.classiccloseouts.com. This site is incredible. I feel like I am in the old Eynon Drug store in PA or the old department store Eric used to work for. Great buys at really great prices.

Anyway now that I'm done advertising, I was the only mom all bundled up this morning. They all show up in short sleeves and shorts. I know living on a lake makes the weather at home completely unrealistic to the weather just up the street, but really. I think my being so skinny and having previous bouts of hypothyroidism, I am just always going to be cold.

Matthew wasn't helping me this morning. He was cold as well and so he didn't want me to stop cuddling to eat, to stop cuddling to get dressed. It really puts crooks in my morning when he wants to cuddle. I'm not complaining because I love those kind of crooks in my morning.

Over the weekend, we spent two days in a row visiting Grandma & Grandpa K for their anniversary so Matthew had a great weekend. Last night we had dinner to celebrate and he loved just being around his cousins and Aunts and Uncles, not to mention Grandma & Grandpa.

This week is going to be another busy week with new friends, play dates at the parks with new and old friends. Last year we made friends with a mom who had three year old triplets (one girl and two boys). Natural, no infertility and she was pregnant with another when we last saw her. The triplets went to school with Matthew at his brief stint of school and I just felt for that mom. And she amazingly made everything look so effortless. The kids were all well behaved, quiet, smiled and her 7 months pregnant at the time acting like everything was wonderful. I would and still look at her with pride.

Her triplets were so used to automatically having playmates from birth that they were already well advanced at socialization. They were content to just be quiet and listen to a story or sit and play next to each other. The little girl was the mother hen always pulling them behind her at the playground like a great little mom.

Today we are meeting them again a a local park with their new baby sister who will be one in December.

At least now the girls even out the boys. They are an automatic team wherever they go.

Later this week, we are having lunch with the mom from Brazil and her little girl and twin boys. Then also we are meeting some moms at a local playground.

The end of next week brings something exciting for all of us. One of our new friends little boy will be turning 5 and we are invited to his party. Matthew is so excited. He is excited to have Daddy meet the kids. He's met the mom when we went out one night for Smithwicks (beer I love from Ireland) but they had just sold out so we had our Irish dinner instead. For anyone who cares, Smithwicks is now available at the local supermarket in MA if it carries beer. I go to Ireland in my mind every time I drink it.

This mom and I have more than a few things in common and I really am glad that God put her in my life. She has made a small difference in what I have been praying for - for a long time. A friend who lives close, has a little boy that we can share ups and downs of life with, have similar backgrounds and goals in life and is extremely family oriented and friend oriented. She is one of the most outgoing people I have met in a long time. She never stops networking and never stops trying to find ways to climb this mountain of motherhood challenges. She is fun loving down on the ground playing and duck duck goosing kind of girl. The kind my son really admires. She is something to watch with her own children but also for me, with Matthew. She treats him like her own. She has this magic thing she does at the playground where she goes under the kids (because she is only 5'2") and runs out and they wind up going high. Matthew has now had it with me because he feels like why can't Mommy do what she does. Mommy is 5'11" and if I ran under the swings I would knock myself out, Matthew off the swing. It wouldn't be pretty.

She also has alot of similarities to my best friend K in PA. I've showed her pictures and told her so. She might have alot of similarities, but each one now has a different special place in my heart. My heart is big enough to hold more than one friend in it (that's why I am also always striving for more). I don't have my family here and this is my way of creating that family for myself. And if these two ever met, they would hit it off enormously. Maybe one day.