Well, I found out the reason I've been so tired. I woke up this morning with what my little guy has had now the last few days. I felt like I was down a tunnel. All congested, sinus pain around my nose, ears hurting, throat sore.
Every time I feel that way, I am reminded of the day of my mom's funeral when I perforated my eardrum...and with Eric being away it really scared me. All of the panic comes back, what if something was to happen to me with just Matthew here? etc.. The other night, I almost fell down my stairs again too. I wasn't doing anything more than walking, with Matthew in front of me, and I slipped and stopped myself with all of my might by grabbing the stair with my hand. My heart was pounding as I started thinking about what my son would do if Mommy was knocked unconscious, God Forbid. Eric and I were discussing it and we really need to teach him the numbers 911 on the phone. He knows to call 911 from watching Danger Rangers, but I think I need to actually show him. Or at least put it on speed dial and teach him the number to hit.
And God Willing, he will never have to use it.
Tonight while eating dinner, I was telling him how sorry I was that he was sick all week and that Mommy was out of it again too and that I wished I was a better Mommy to him sometimes. He said to me again "Mommy, take a deep breath and you are a better Mommy"....I'm not lying, this is my insightful, sometimes old beyond his years angel. Thank you God for getting me through another day and for letting him be apart of it.
Every night I Thank God for my miracle, tonight I just feel like telling the whole world, Thank God for my miracle.
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